We all know that we are not like anyone else on this planet yet we still compare ourselves to others. It's human nature to look at the person standing in front of you up and down, and compare yourself to them. While men do this as well, most seem to compare to compete, meaning they look at others to boost the image of themselves “my arms are bigger than his, my car is faster than his”. However, when women do this they are either comparing the most beautiful feature of the woman standing in front of her to their own worst feather, or plain out tearing that woman in front of her apart”. Few women look at another beautiful woman and have nothing but wonderful things to say about her. Keep in mind we are talking about all the thoughts that go on in a woman’s head. A woman can think one thing and say a completely different thing; we are so good at that. “Half of the 2,000 women polled by online retailer Swimwear 365 said they 'enjoy' comparing themselves to women they work with, befriend or pass in the street. And the beach is the place where most female ogling goes on, with 80 percent of those polled saying they love having a good look at other women when they are sunbathing…. Clocking other women's shoes, height, cellulite, where their handbag is from and whether or not they have had plastic surgery is the usual thought process, the study found. Others check out women to see if they are thinner than them.” Read more here The truth is if comparing yourself is how you evaluate your worth, you will always end up disappointed. Research has found that comparing breeds feelings of envy, low-self confidence, and depression. In life you will never reach a point where you are better than someone else in every way. Even more why would you want to be? We all have our strengths in areas and weaknesses in other areas.
Being aware that you are comparing yourself to another is KEY! “You must acknowledge what the problem is and how it’s manifesting in your life. What low confidence thoughts, actions, and choices are you making in your life right now? In what areas of your life might others perceive you as weak or insecure? Be honest with yourself and acknowledge where you need a confidence boost.... Look for authentic, positive situations present in your life right now that reflect confidence and strength. There are likely plenty if you mindfully look around. In other words, train your mind to see the good in everything.” (You can read an excellent article about confidence here.) Don’t allow people to compare yourself to others as well, and don’t do it to yourself in front of others making fun of yourself may open doors to others thinking they can do the same. Comparing yourself to others wastes energy, lowers your confidence, and is meaningless. Ones beauty does not define another. The fitness world is already a highly competitive field, who won the race, 1st place, who can lift the most, who can do the most pushups etc. Then we add in social media with filters, and muscle pumps, and runners posting their fastest miles, longest runs and best booty angles. What you don’t see are the relaxed muscles, the slow runs, the miles that were not completed because they just weren't feeling it, the bloated tummy’s from a fun weekend with the family, the regular booty angles, and all the 3rd, 4th, 10th, 20th places they took before they took a first place.
Stand in front of the mirror and compliment your strengths, compliment your beautiful features, and give yourself a big high five for completing your workouts. Acknowledge your NSV’s (non-scale victories) what are you doing today that you couldn't do yesterday? What clothes can you now wear with confidence? The truth is the only person you should compare yourself to, is the person you were yesterday. The only person you should run faster than is the girl who ran in your shoes yesterday. The only booty you should be comparing yours too is the one in your mirror yesterday. Once you come to terms that you are a beautiful unique woman, have confidence in all that you are, and be thankful for all of your abilities, you will start to look others and not compare but be inspired, respect, and appreciate their beautiful features. After a couple months of intense workouts you will come to appreciate the dedication and hard work that toned muscles take, and compliment others on their hard work, you can appreciate a woman who takes care of her body and nourishes it with healthy foods.
Mark Twain said “Comparison is the death of joy” and research and science agree with him. It’s true everybody is different because EVERY BODY is different. When you start to see more positive in others you will see more positive in yourself. Don’t be discouraged comparing yourself to others is a habit that takes time to change. Don’t ever give up if you never give up, you can never fail.
XOXO
Flex it Pink
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